What are the pros and cons of banning homosexuality?

Let’s not overlook the tragic consequences a ban like that would have—countless lives lost to both violence and suicide. And speaking personally, as a cetrosexual trans woman who happens to be a high-functioning psychopath, let me make something clear: anyone foolish enough to show up at my home to impose their arrogant and ignorant views on me or my wife (who’s also trans) would be making their final mistake. Let’s just say their heads might make excellent paperweights—a stark reminder for others to leave people alone and mind their own business.

The pros and cons of banning homosexuality? This trainwreck of a hypothetical…

Pros of Banning Homosexuality (Spoiler: There aren’t any, but here’s the sarcasm anyway):

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Banning homosexuality would be like banning oxygen. It’s natural, necessary, and no amount of legislation will change that. The only thing such a ban would achieve is showing the world how outdated and irrelevant those in power are. The LGBTQ+ community has existed throughout history, across cultures, and in every corner of the globe. They’re not going anywhere.

Massive brain drain: Some of the most talented people in history were LGBTQ+. Alan Turing literally helped save the world from fascism during World War II. Imagine a world without his contributions because someone decided to criminalize his existence. Genius doesn’t care about sexual orientation, but bigotry sure knows how to ruin it.

You look ridiculous: Let’s face it—this kind of ban is rooted in fear and ignorance, and the world knows it. You might as well tattoo "I’m terrified of rainbows" on your forehead.

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So let’s not waste time legislating hate when we could be working on real problems—like fixing climate change, ending poverty, or explaining why Nickelback still exists.

Cons of Banning Homosexuality (Because they’re endless):

Legal nightmare: Policing love? Yeah, that’s going to go over well. Let’s make cops spend their time investigating who kissed whom instead of tackling, you know, actual crimes. Brilliant allocation of resources.

Is using tech to track or monitor your partner’s activities a sign of love, insecurity, or control?

Haters unite: Bigots everywhere will band together in solidarity, chanting slogans that make no sense. The rest of us will enjoy the comedy gold.

Straight people get more screen time: If banning homosexuality somehow affects media, you might get 100% straight leads in movies. Unfortunately, they’ll be in remakes no one asked for because originality often thrives in diversity.

You eliminate glitter shortages: Without Pride parades, the world would probably have more glitter in stock. But at what cost?

Why do some films seem to date/age so badly?

It doesn’t even work: Banning homosexuality won’t make LGBTQ+ people disappear. It’ll just make life miserable for them while fueling an underground resistance. Spoiler alert: humans don’t stop being who they are because you said so.

Global embarrassment: You’d join the ranks of authoritarian regimes that think banning human rights is a great idea. Good luck explaining that to future generations when they study this era like we study the Salem Witch Trials.

You’d ban a basic human right: Telling people who they can or can’t love is the dictionary definition of tyranny. Congratulations, you’ve just turned your government into a dictatorship over people’s private lives. What’s next? A ban on pineapple on pizza?

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Economy tanks: The LGBTQ+ community contributes billions to the economy. Pride events, tourism, fashion, tech—it's like banning creativity itself. Good luck filling that financial black hole.

Bigots feel validated: Finally, people who can’t mind their own business get to feel powerful. They can high-five each other while the rest of society cringes in collective embarrassment.